Wednesday, September 28, 2011

A Woman with Issues

Many women talk among themselves about other women, and often men do the same.  When we talk about a woman with issues, we are usually referring to the 'drama queen',  the woman with a great deal of negative energy, always whining and complaining about anything and everything and to anyone that will listen.  Wel,l when I looked at myself yesterday  I discovered that I too am 'a woman with issues'.

  No, not the kind that was just described, but issues just the same. You see I am in the throws of menopause. Should I say more.  I didn't think so.  I have said before that I have never been a moody person, and I am usually of even temperament, but boy has that changed. It is even making me take a step back and look at myself as though I am seeing me for the very first time.  However, since I have to live with myself, I am having to re-learn how to get along with myself.  I know you are thinking that I am starting to sound like a crazy woman, well you have hit the nail on the head, because I so often feel like a crazy woman.

The highs and lows of my moods these days almost feel like there is some split personality going on inside and it is not pretty.  I have recently named that other personality 'she devil' because it is almost that evil, at least by my standards.

 All jokes aside, there is really no warning out there for the emotional and physical symptoms of menopause.  I am, however, grateful for all of the information that is available and that more and more women are talking about it than before.  It is something that you have to experience first hand to really know Yes there are other issues. Sometimes I have to stop and think about which one of them I am dealing with at any given moment. 

Thanks to the most recent climate changes, my sinuses are going haywire, which causes me to suffer for 2-3 days at  a time. Yet I am also taking Vicodin, because   oftenI have  flare ups from the most recent neck surgery. I told my mom that I when I wake up most mornings, I have to first figure out what issue I am dealing with in order to know which pill to take, antihistamine, Vicodin, or hormones. I now know what older people meant when they said, 'don't get old girl'.

Yes I am grateful to get older because in my book any day above ground is a good day, but they are definitely challenging ones. It is said that 50 is the new 30, but hell there are those times when it is just 50. So as I said in the beginning, I realize that I too am a woman with issues.  So the connotation of the term has definitely changed for me.  Please tell me I am not alone.

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